Dating Advice For Women (TYPES of GUYS to Avoid) – The RED Flags. Do you know what’s, one of the best things that you can do to attract the right guy into your life? Well, let me suggest to you that one of the best ways to attract the right guy is to quickly dismiss the wrong guy. I can’t tell you how many women i’ve talked to who said that they wasted 3 months with the wrong guy. Or a year with the wrong guy. Worse yet, multiple years with the wrong guy.
When in the beginning there was something in their gut. Something in their intuition that told them that this wasn’t the right guy for them. So how can you quickly identify the wrong guy so that you can make room for the right guy? Well, today, i’m, going to give you some deadly red flags to watch out for. So we’re talking about some deadly red flags that let you know that you’ve got the wrong guy.
And you should cast him aside to make room for the right guy. One of the the first deadly flag is beauty and the beast disclosures: Now what do i mean by beauty and the beast disclosures? You know the Disney movie beauty and the beast. Now in beauty and the beast there’s this arrogant young prince who meets a wicked enchantress.
Dating Advice For Women (Red flags in a guy” – The Beauty & the Beast
She puts a spell on him, turning him into a beast. And the spell is not broken until he learns to both love and be loved. And then he meets belle. It’s this woman, who brings out the love in him, teaches him to love and be loved. And he turns back into this amazing prince who is now not arrogant anymore, but transformed well.
That analogy carries forward in relationships today. Because often you will meet a guy where it’s a bit reverse. He looks beautiful & he looks amazing. He’s got status and he might be successful. He’s got a great body, he might just be really hot and he will try to tell you what a beast he is on the inside. And if you’re not careful, you can be enamored with just how beautiful he is, how hot he is. And you can think well, i can change him.
The love that i have and the love he will feel for me – will change that part of him on the inside and make things better. I’ll give you an example of this. A woman that i coached described a scenario where she met this guy and on the second date he told her. Now you don’t know this about me, but i am a total A** hole and he said it kind of in a joking way. And she thought well, he’s, probably just joking.
“The A** Hole Type of Guy – Red flags in a relationship with a man”
Because who would say that about themselves on a second date well turns out this guy was a total A**hole. Because a few months into dating he was disrespecting her in front of her friends. He was verbally abusing her calling her names. Now this woman had enough self-respect and self-worth that she left this guy. But it was after months of wasting time with the wrong guy.
When, on the second date he told her the beast he was. And so she regretted, i should have listened to him on the second date. I would have saved myself all kinds of time. What are other things that guys will say? Guys will say things like? I am a horrible planner. You’d be the planner or guys will say like i’m emotionally unavailable. Like i have a hard time connecting to my emotions. And the dysfunctional thought is to think well that’s just because you haven’t met me.
Yet the woman who thinks that you haven’t met me. I’m, going to help transform you. I’m going to bring out the best in you. That is a dysfunctional thought. Because you’re asking him to change. Know this don’t expect him to change. Because men rarely will change and become that beautiful guy that you want him to be. Meet someone who is already that beautiful guy? (One of the most important Dating Advice For Women): What happens is a woman wants him to change because she gets validation and worth by transforming him.
“Another Red Flags in a Guy – The Big Praise, The Big Pause”
And is almost always a recipe for disaster? The healthy thought is this: oh you haven’t done your work yet. I’m sorry it’s not my job to raise you. You can go ahead and do that work and then you can meet me where i am. The second deadly red flag – Dating Advice For Women (red flags in a guy) is what i call big praise, big pause. And what that means is you’re with a guy and it’s just going great. Like he’s pouring interest on you. You’re vibing together.
He’s telling you how awesome you are. He’s like wow i had such a blast with you. You’re, so special, so unique. Like we should do this again Sometime. And then boom…. you just don’t hear from him. And it’s a significant amount of time before you hear from him again. But when he does pop back up, he’s praising you. He’s, telling you how busy he got with work.
Or something happened with his family, something came up. That to you is a logical reason why he wouldn’t contact you for that period of time. It makes sense why he would just disappear for that period of time. And you’re willing to give them another chance. But then again **** you don’t hear from them again.
And this becomes a pattern. The big praise big pause pattern. Now this is often confusing, because the big praise feels so authentic. It feels so real and it is, but he’s got this pattern of not following through well. Let me describe something when it comes to men. The most important indicator of interest is follow-through. How is he showing up over time?
“Dating Advice For Women – The real men who will love you no matter what”
Affection without follow-through is like a mirage right. It looks promising, but when you walk down that path, you are left thirsting for something real men who like you. Want to be with you: men who like you, want to connect. And they will find a way a man who’s into you, will swim, the sea, he will climb the mountain he will overcome that wall.
He will find a way to be with you. Let me give you an easy test to run in your own mind, to identify whether this is big praise, big pause and a red flag. Or you should be giving him some more chances and that’s what’s called the silent movie test? You remember the old silent movies that are black and white (Dating Advice For Women). And they didn’t have any talking. It was simply music and people running around and just based on their behavior.
You could identify the story line. We’ll turn the last few interactions with him into a silent movie, black and white movie in your mind. And take out what he’s saying and just look at how he’s behaving. Would you identify his behavior as someone who really likes you. And if it is then keep seeing him. If it’s not identify it as a red flag, because what you’re looking for, is to not have big praise.
“The Big ones”
Big paws but big praise, big presence, because big praise, big paws, is a red flag. But big praise, big presence is what you’re looking for. You’re looking for his presence in your life. Dating Advice For Women – red flags in a guy (Red flag number three): is you consistently make him feel better. Now I know this is a bit of a strange one. Wouldn’t you think it would be a good thing if you consistently make him feel better. You know you call him up and you say: hey babe, how you doing he’s like oh i’m doing so much better.
Now that i’m talking to you that’s, a good thing right? Wrong that is not a good thing and here’s why? If you notice that you consistently make him feel better? In other words, he’s consistently stressed out until he talks to you. Or he’s angry until he talks to you or life isn’t going good until he talks to you. Guess what those states are where he Lives that feeling of being stressed. That feeling of being angry, that feeling of being sad, that’s where he lives most of the time.
You can call that his emotional home. People who feel a certain way most of the time they recreate that feeling. That’s why they feel that way. Most of the time that’s why happy people tend to be happy? Angry people tend to be angry, stressed people tend to be stressed. And we don’t change that emotional home from the outside.
“Remember the 2 thing (red flags in a guy)”
In so you’re saying well isn’t it a good thing that i’m making him feel better well. It is in the short run, but here’s what happens? The only way that he changes that emotional home is from the inside out. So eventually, when you’re around him enough, it won’t, be you changing him? It’ll be him maintaining that negative state while being with you.
So you’re, attracting to yourself a guy who’s most of the time stressed. Or most of the time angry, most of the time disappointed, or whatever his emotional home is. So i encourage you to ask yourself this question. What kind of emotion or energy do i want to surround myself with on a daily basis? And then find out? Where does he live most of the time. If those two things are congruent… thumbs up? This is a good guy, but if those things are not congruent, then that is a red flag. That you want to be highly aware of.
Now i have a question for you: what are the red flags? You notice, when a man is wasting your time, go ahead and write them in the comment section below i love reading your comments, because every week we put out fresh blogs on Dating Advice For Women to empower you in your love life. Love & Peace 🙂